Soul Diseases

The disease that knowledge bring is arrogance, and the disease that worship bring is showing off

by Ibnu Taimiyyah

By nature Human is plagued with many diseases, spanning from the physiological, to metaphysics until the unseen, the soul one. The first two diseases can be possibly detected through various medical methods. Nevertheless the third one, the soul disease is challenging to be detected.

Ibnu Taimiyyah recommended two indicators to identify when one (or even ourselves) is being plagued with the disease resulted from knowledge and worship. If one is enriched with knowledge while he/she is not purifying the heart, then arrogance will conquers him/her. This can be displayed through their arrogance behavior. On the other hand, if he/she ‘dedicated’ him/herself to God through endless worships, then he/she has the tendency showing off all his/her worships to others. This could be suggesting that their worship is not authentically for God but only for people to see and gain worldly benefits.

In a nutshell, we have to always alert and take caution with our intention and the state of our soul in pursuing the journey to be a learned person and devout soul to God. Both have challenges in the pursuit of our authentic goals. Always purify the soul and then let the purified soul to be the compass to navigate and orienting the direction.

Jika kamu dikecewakan …

Jika kamu dikecewakan datangilah Allah Azawajalla segera. Hanya Allah lah sahaja yang berkuasa menghilangkannya. Kerana Allah lah sahaja yang ada penawarnya.

Jangan tunggu. Jangan berlengah-lengah. Jangan terus tinggal dalam gua kekecewaanmu. Sebaliknya, sempurnakanlah perasaan kecewamu itu dengan kembali kepada Allah Azawajalla. Pulangkanlah kekecewaan mu itu pada penciptanya, Allah Azawajalla. Bagaimana? Munajat lah dengan Allah dalam solat-solatmu dan doa-doamu terutamanya satu pertiga malam. Dan juga basahkan lidah dan bibirmu dengar zikrullah. Allah mendengar rintihan hatimu dan tidak akan ada satupun akan terlepas dan disia-siakanNYA.

Kamu tidak boleh terus kecewa dan bersedih dengan sesuatu atau seseorang penyebab kepada kekecewaan dan kesedihanmu. Mengapa? Awas! Ia akan mengundang kecelakaan besar terhadap dirimu! Bagaimana? Perasaanmu itu akan terus membara membara dan membesar dengan maraknya. Dan akhirnya, hatimu yang kecewa dan sedih itu akan beransur-ansur beralih kepada kebencian! Akibatnya dirimu akan selalu hidup diselubungi amarah ini. Seluruh energimu akan dimagnetkan sehingga tidak tersisapun kepada amarah ini. Tidakkah ini satu kehidupan yang sia-sia?

Mintalah Allah menjaga dirimu dan seluruh kehidupanmu sejak kamu diciptakan Allah dalam rahim ibumu, sehingga ketika ini, dan sehinggalah hari Kiamat. Mintalah pertolongan dan kekuatan dari Allah untuk tinggalkan kekecewaan dan kesedihanmu serta segala punca-puncanya itu. Dan secepat mungkin terus berfikir semuanya itu hanya ujian semata-mata dari Allah Ta’ala. Jadi dengan rahmat dan redha Allah maka akan terpadamlah perasaan kecewa, kesedihan mahupun kemarahan itu dalam dirimu, dan akhirnya perlahan-lahan ketenangan akan menyelinap ke dalam hatimu seterusnya memenuhi ruangan hatimu dan akhirnya bertahta di hatimu. InsyaAllah.

Berusahalah! Kerana dirimu sangat berharga. Setiap detik masa kehidupan yang berlalu tidak mungkin boleh dikembalikan semula.

Subhanallah. Allahuakbar. Alhamdulillah

Bacaan tambahan: Meraih ketenangan hati yang hakiki


Fear does not prevent death, it prevents life

by Naquib Mahfouz

Naquib words of wisdom tells you that you have to face the fear in you. The more you fear something, the more you need to deal with it. Why dealing it upfront is crucial? Simply, fear prevents you to pursue life. You need to overcome fear in order to progress in life.

If you did make attempts to deal with your fear and failed many times, do not despair. Try again, and again until you landed with the one or several that kills your fear permanently.

I believe it’s not the solution that makes you stronger to face fear. However, unconsciously the skills that you’ve developed in the process of striving to overcome your fear is the gold! That harnessed skills are the one that are making you a stronger person. So keep it going!

Read More and Different Contents

How I can think differently from others? I mean how I can enrich my ideas, knowledge and understanding on something and take different path from others?

Read! Yes that answer is R.E.A.D.!

Read books or read quality materials with substance. And more specifically, read books or materials different from others. Since the content of I read serves as fuel to my thoughts, this serves that path for thoughts. If I read same books like others, my idea and thoughts are going to be the same like others. In addition reading the common books or materials, I need to explore other good books/materials (rare materials) to pave different paths or alternatives. Just like the saying of Haruka Murakami:

If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you only think what everyone else is thinking!

Don’t Worry Failing!

Be brave to face the reality of riding storms in your life. Successful people like Canfield, Edison, and Kiyosaki, always articulate positively about failingCanfield views failing is an opportunity to make attempts. Edison believes that failures are connected to how close we’re to succeed.  And interestingly, Kiyosaki sees failure as an essential part of the learning curve, thus failing is needed to become a learned person. Our experiences talk louder than these words. Don’t worry about failing, keep trying! Keep progressing! Success is just around the corner.


Don’t worry about failures,

Worry about the chances you miss

when you don’t even try.

 by  Jack Canfield


Many of life’s failures are people

who did not realize how close they were to success

when they gave up

by Thomas Edison


Successful people don’t fear failure

but understand that it’s necessary to learn and grow from

by Robert Kiyosaki

You’re Not Alone

When you feel your shout unheard

Believe me you’re not alone

When you feel your friends deserted you

Believe me you’re not alone

When you feel your reachout hand ignored

Believe me you’re not alone

When you feel your candle failed to light up

Believe me you’re not alone

When you feel, God don’t react to your prayers

Believe me, that’s untrue

Look up, you will see a rainbow on top of you!

Why I Write My Voice


I’m inspired to share my reasons to write after reading ‘Why I Write‘ by Hira N.      Her truthful reasons echoes in my brain, Why I Write?

I asked my inner self repeatedly Why I Write?

I felt seeing myself going into my brain rummaging through every cell of it searching for the reasons. I am not ashamed to confess that I am a survivor from a narcissistic relationship. The relationship that was not long. It stands for just 6 months. God Bless me for not testing me longer than that. Alhamdulillah.

Nevertheless,  the damage of that six months to my brain is tremendous! This is in particular when I was at the most critical point of finishing my Ph.D., writing. Yes, writing. When writing is the most critical skill that I need. and where I needed my thinking with clarity!!!

Why do I write? Why you write?

Why I Write?

First and foremost, I write for therapeutic reasons.

I write to control my brain from wandering everywhere. I realize that when you write –you’re writing about something, you need to stay focus to write on what you say that you’re going to write. So by doing that you train and refrained your brain from going off-track. I believe writing works for my brain as it increases the ‘pay attention time’ to say focus. Good writing needs clarity in presenting thoughts and ideas as well as arguments. Good writing putting ideas until one will arrive at a logical flow. So this requires my brain to truly stay focus. The struggle is real and it deprives a tremendous energy of my brain.

What happens to my feeling at this time? Well, frankly, writing in not my strength. This is especially when it comes to writing in a language that is not my mother tongue. This is my major setback.

I write to keep up with my hibernating brain. I write so that I don’t lose my flow of writing in my dissertation. I write to express things that I can’t express verbally. I write to think clearly. I write to verify things that I’m uncertain about that are thumping in my heart. I write to win the battle with the monster of doubtful. Doubtful feelings kill my passion and progress.

Second, I write to re-learn about myself. I write to remind myself of who I am. The crazy experience with the narcissist slowly kills my connection with my inner self. How? It attacks my identity, my confidence, my life principals and my core values as well as your wholebeing. Through writing I re-enter into my thoughts and feelings to hunt my old self. I found my old self buried deep under layers of lies, fake accusations and distorted reality as well as evil emotional burdens and fragility. I found her and I pulled her out and cleanse her from all the burdens and fragility. Alhamdulillah. Yeah, it is the feeling of finding my way home. Because of that I write so I feel good of ‘coming home’. Why I feel good? I pour out the boxes of thoughts with ‘the other person’ distorted identity and principals and values that are incorporated by forced into my inner being that dragged me to the confusion state of who I am, suffocated and unheard. Yes, and I write to be heard. To be heard by myself. I want to hear news from the inner self me!

Third,  I write to learn. In the recent years I’ve discovered that writing is one of the effective ways to learn. Well, I have to dig out my brain as well as planted new knowledge to better understand on something. I write to remember new things that I learned. I write to expand ideas and thoughts. I write to get facts connected. I write for sense-making. This purpose also helps me identify the gaps in my understanding that I have on the pursuit of understanding on certain subjects.

Fourth, I write to share and relate to others: I write to share my deepest pain. I write to relate to others who have similarly experienced. I found that when I can relate to other experiences that similar, I feel the burden lifted. I feel that I’m not alone. Normal people do walking rough path journey. And most importantly, I learnt about how to go about to overcome their challenges to face the same experiences. How they react to address the challenge. This is gold. Like one proverb say, you can change lemon to lemonade! That will make your day!

Fifth,  I write as a reminder and guide to walk through the turbulence. From this perspective, I see writing as a savior tool to remind me. I always forgot where I have been in my life after the life turbulence. I thought I walked out from it safely. And never, ever bump into it. The mistakes. The killing pains. The silly things. But NO, the turbulence never forgets me. Sometimes I get caught again with the same trap. And then again walking the mess, these printed words of the past reminds me, guide me, and encourage me to walk through the past again. Last time I made, God Willing, I will make it through again, and again.

Sixth, I write to inspire others that they can do it too! I write as I want to make writing as a habit and turning it into a hobby. I write to touch my inner feelings and deep thoughts. I write with my feelings. I write my thoughts. I write to think. I write to validate.  I write to learn. I write to persuade. I write to reach others who might have undergone similar paths of life. I write to know that I’m not different than other people out here. I write to say to others that you’re alone. I write to tell others that I can do it and so can you. I write to share that to know whether the pain in my heart is natural. I write to recreate. I write to get to know myself. I write to make new friends with same boats.

Seventh, I write for some many reasons! Alright, I write so many other reasons! I write an art of sing a song.  I write in pain sometimes in frustration. I write to learn to be truthful about my feelings. I write to learn to be articulated with my thoughts. I write to reflect.  I write to rewired my brain. I write to rationalize myself. I write when I’m angry. I write to delay my outburst when I’m angry. I have endless of reasons to dive into writing.

Finally, as I’ve declare earlier when I opened this window on Why I Write, I write for therapeutic reasons.

Can you relate to anyone of them? If not What are your reasons to write?

Jealousy Kills

In the past weeks, I learn a hard life lesson

Jealousy kills love?

But on the second thought

Jealousy may be a test to true love? 

If your loved ones truly love you

The best of you and the bad of you

Then He/She is able to forgive you? 

What do you think? About how jealousy impact your relationship with loved ones? 

One Step at A Time

Hello hellooooo 🙂

I missed writing in this virtual space. I missed thinking and expressing my self. Along this line, I believe thinking and writing processes force me to do reflections, over and over, until I get my thoughts typed down in a logical way.

Where I’ve been? I’ve trying to get things strengthened up one at a time. Traveling and working slowing up the process though.

But most importantly, after two years, I managed to unbox all my shipped stuff. I’ve solved one problem, and yet another problem awaits! Ghee … I don’t know how to store all stuff in a tidy and systematic way. My current rental house has a limited space. And then I need several storage boxes to keep them away properly. This requires money money … How you do you store your stuff in a small space? 


Progress is HOPE! 

So again, one step a time is a good tagline for this. My supervisor always say ” … the most important is progress ” . Yup, progress. Progress is the word of HOPE. That is the most important.

I will catch-up you guys later!



Truest Sentence

When I woke up that day, the words of Ernest Hemingway called for me to take up my pen again. He said


I agree with him that when I write one truest sentence that I found in my truth, then words continue to flow on their own to narrate the whole story.

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